Something that seems so impossible can be absolutely possible if you really believe in it.
I never believe to have a feeling with someone I met in cyberspace. Someone who's for sure, I never knew before, I don't have any idea about him at all. Yes, I heard some experiences from my friends who got boyfriend from the internet and they meet up and hook up and be like a normal couple for a very long time. But that was just a crazy idea that I never thought would ever, once again - EVER, happen to me. But it does.
Since the first time we chatted, I feel so click with him. I don't know why. Okay, tell you the truth, I don't like talking with a stranger in cyber world with an exception that she's a girl or he's handsome. Yeah. I'm picky, ugly people is out of my way! Heheh.. Anyway, we just talked and talked like we're an old friend. Like, I don't know, I feel like, we're just connected. He's there for me. Especially when I remembered how down my feeling was that time, and suddenly someone came and just turned my mood better.
He's my twin. He's sweet. He's bad. He's different. He's complicated. He's there. He's adorable. He's impossible. He's sensitive. He's a dreamer. He's for good. And above all, he's mine. That's turn him to be possible. I would sit longer than I used to do just staring at my lappy and waiting for him to chatt with him. Sharing the things that I can't even share it with my best friends. I don't know why I trust him. Maybe because I don't know him at all and I feel like my secret will be safe with him? I have no idea at all.
I decided to meet him, for the first time in my life. I did another unimaginable thing. Me?? Meeting up with a stranger? Someone I just knew from Facebook? Crazy? I was. Out of my mind? I did. But I believe in myself. I had a very strong feeling that I wanna meet him. I wanna see him. I wanna know about him more. I believe in him, somehow. Then, we were there. See each other for the first time. Eveerything went as nice as it should be. But, no further move. I knew it, he knew it. Something very special doesn't go so fast or it won't be special at all.
A few days of meeting him bring me to another world. I miss him? Yes, I absolutely do! But what is this feeling inside? Love? Okay, I don't think so. I know it's not love? Then I realize.. a crush? Maybe I am. Suddenly I have a faith on him. Or I shouldn't? That's what he's gonna advice me. Don't trust him. Don't give him faith. But, it's my life. I do what I wanna do. I wanna take the chance. And, he's gonna say; up to you :D
Things have changed a little bit once I know that he introduces me as his girlfriend. I mean, wow. Since when? He never officially asked me. But, okay I don't mind with it. Then, I can't help it so I asked him. Anyway, the point is, we are couple. Then this is where I start the issue.
He has his past. He left some stories that he hasn't finished yet, or maybe he did but he forgot to close the book and put it in the rack. He must through a lot. He does, maybe, open his door for me. But he's not yet, I believe, opening his heart for me. He let me to his life, but I can't enjoy the time he gives me, yet. It makes me sad? I guess so. But no matter what, it's his life. He should make the best decision for himself. He has to stand up for what he wants, what he needs.
Sometimes, it hurts me when I have to compete with his past. Something that doesn't exist in his present life, but he keeps turning back and look at the past. How can I compete with something that is so invisible and unreachable? What should I do?
Since the first time we chatted, I feel so click with him. I don't know why. Okay, tell you the truth, I don't like talking with a stranger in cyber world with an exception that she's a girl or he's handsome. Yeah. I'm picky, ugly people is out of my way! Heheh.. Anyway, we just talked and talked like we're an old friend. Like, I don't know, I feel like, we're just connected. He's there for me. Especially when I remembered how down my feeling was that time, and suddenly someone came and just turned my mood better.
He's my twin. He's sweet. He's bad. He's different. He's complicated. He's there. He's adorable. He's impossible. He's sensitive. He's a dreamer. He's for good. And above all, he's mine. That's turn him to be possible. I would sit longer than I used to do just staring at my lappy and waiting for him to chatt with him. Sharing the things that I can't even share it with my best friends. I don't know why I trust him. Maybe because I don't know him at all and I feel like my secret will be safe with him? I have no idea at all.
I decided to meet him, for the first time in my life. I did another unimaginable thing. Me?? Meeting up with a stranger? Someone I just knew from Facebook? Crazy? I was. Out of my mind? I did. But I believe in myself. I had a very strong feeling that I wanna meet him. I wanna see him. I wanna know about him more. I believe in him, somehow. Then, we were there. See each other for the first time. Eveerything went as nice as it should be. But, no further move. I knew it, he knew it. Something very special doesn't go so fast or it won't be special at all.
A few days of meeting him bring me to another world. I miss him? Yes, I absolutely do! But what is this feeling inside? Love? Okay, I don't think so. I know it's not love? Then I realize.. a crush? Maybe I am. Suddenly I have a faith on him. Or I shouldn't? That's what he's gonna advice me. Don't trust him. Don't give him faith. But, it's my life. I do what I wanna do. I wanna take the chance. And, he's gonna say; up to you :D
Things have changed a little bit once I know that he introduces me as his girlfriend. I mean, wow. Since when? He never officially asked me. But, okay I don't mind with it. Then, I can't help it so I asked him. Anyway, the point is, we are couple. Then this is where I start the issue.
He has his past. He left some stories that he hasn't finished yet, or maybe he did but he forgot to close the book and put it in the rack. He must through a lot. He does, maybe, open his door for me. But he's not yet, I believe, opening his heart for me. He let me to his life, but I can't enjoy the time he gives me, yet. It makes me sad? I guess so. But no matter what, it's his life. He should make the best decision for himself. He has to stand up for what he wants, what he needs.
Sometimes, it hurts me when I have to compete with his past. Something that doesn't exist in his present life, but he keeps turning back and look at the past. How can I compete with something that is so invisible and unreachable? What should I do?
1 comment:
Like the old quote I often hear in romantic movies, "I will never can compete with your past.."
But this is your choice. You are the one who decided it.
So once you decided to run, never stop before you reach the finish line. AS A WINNER.
You go girl! :)
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